We’ve been joyfully married for 8 years, and we’d like to share some of the ways we’ve been blessed by our marriage.
I (Sam) didn’t get married until I was 30, so there were a fair few years where I lived out of my family home as a single man. I had some very good friends, but I longed for the closeness and companionship of a wife. I lived with friends, but over time they or I moved for work, and sometimes my friends got married. Before I met Rach I had come to terms with the idea that I may never get married, I trusted God could have a wife for me but that I could be content if He didn’t. But I very much wanted to be married and prayed I would be one day.
God did answer my prayers by bringing me Rach. I’ve been very blessed by the closeness and companionship Rach and I enjoy. As a single person a lot of things in my life had been temporary. You can’t really stop things changing in life but in our marriage vows we vowed to be faithful and to love, honour and cherish each other till death do us part. I know we both find comfort in the stability that comes from that commitment to each other. No matter what happens, we’ve committed to go through it together, to enjoy the good times together, to help each other in the bad, to share our lives, our possessions, our thoughts, worries and joys. While we’re grateful for the lessons we learnt and opportunities of that season, neither of us miss our pre-marital days.
I (Rach) did have a sexual relationship before our marriage, though I knew it wasn’t Gods way. I can testify to the goodness of Gods design. He created sex for both husbands and wives to enjoy within the safety and lifelong commitment of marriage. There is truly no comparison between my experience before marriage and the intimacy, emotional and physical, that we share in our marriage.
We have learned so much about pleasing each other. We’ve had a lot of vulnerable conversations, and we’ve taken time to learn. We’re still learning! Sex in marriage has created memories that the two of us can look back on with such joy, and that has deepened our love with time. No shame or regret.
We’re grateful to God for 2 little children so far as a result of our shared love. We don’t fear finding I’m pregnant. Our little ones have added challenges yes, but so much joy! We’d both say that having our children has made us so much more aware of our mutual dependence on each other, parenting alone must be very hard work.
A good marriage does take a lot of prayer, effort and communication. We have had seasons where it has felt far from easy, where it’s felt uphill. We’ve hurt each other and disagreed with one another. But we both feel very rewarded for working together at growing a good marriage, and for not giving up when it hasn’t been smooth. Not a lot of very good and worthwhile things happen without any effort – and marriage is no exception.
We’re so grateful to God our Redeemer, for His forgiveness and His good plan in bringing us together in marriage.
Then the man said, “This at last is bone of my bone and flesh of my flesh; she shall be called Woman, because she was taken out of Man.” Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and they shall become one flesh.”
Genesis 2:23-24
